I Deleted a Song

I can no longer dance to that song
As my body is no longer capable
Of making those silly moves
We hilariously yet confidently executed
Oh, it belonged to us
It was to be forever ours
But ahead of you
Is a broad array of songs
Waiting to be loved that way
And you felt responsible for them
So I waited as you move around
Cherishing them one by one
Because I only had that one song

I remained patient
Watching from the side
Wishing that you will play it again
And thankfully you did
Yet only to be skipped
Repeatedly, deliberately
That even I
Have forgotten the moves
I cried then tried to remember
And cried again
For my effort was in vain
Why couldn’t I?
Then I looked at you

I laughed at what was in front of me
Seeing you reminded me
Of my long-standing foolishness
You never let our song reach its end
For you’ve grown accustomed to loud songs
That you can no longer hear
The low volume of ours
Then what was the purpose of a song
Making feel frustrated when I hear it
And as for you, inaudible
I’ve been hurt and tired
And you, only bothered
I deleted that song, solely for me

Some may say it’s pathetic, stupid, and immature
But I refuse to someday be lost in the sea
You call playlist.

---

Let go when needed, don’t make happiness wait for you.

I Shouldn’t, Right?

all the questions I never asked
they still reside in my mind
often silently
but when the dark arrives
I grapple against them
they overpower
even the music that
walked me to myself

no, it’s not because I’m not okay
the truth is
I finally feel like a bird
which was once just a dream

I’m not sure if it’s universal
but when the comfort I hoped for
embraced me with its warmth
it felt uncomfortable
the silence felt less loud
and I was shocked,
I tried to be calm
then, it was raining for weeks

being at the edge
have I grown used to it?
I shouldn’t think
‘send me back’

I shouldn’t right?
yet it sometimes seems alright.

---

I posted after a long time, I guess I remembered that I shouldn’t let my wits wilt. To the person reading this, live fully and be happy. Below is a wonderful song you can listen to.

Seeping Sadness

Seeping Sadness

The sun may fade, but it’s not gone
Wakes up again like everyone
They both bring life a yellow light
A tight embrace; makes us alright

Like strings attached to each other
People together are stronger
But one grows weak and leaves one day
Sadness sprout, soar, and even stay

Two yesterdays, my mind’s a mess
Both of my friends put through the test
The trees they loved turned into logs
The lonely, cold air stood with fogs

A dull whistle to the sad heart
Dust in the eyes and is rampant
Soft, silent cries flapped in the wind
Thinking back, realized they sinned

Melancholy saddled to them
They both have lost a precious gem
It smelt theirs, but the whiff is faint
Inside their souls, a heavy weight

The words they said rang in my head
Thoughts and tears while I lay in bed
Saddened, deaths dripped into my heart
Towards regrets, I’ll be apart.

---

This is a poem about death, it reflects the loss of my two old friends. I am not proud nor satisfied with this piece, it is a topic that I cannot quite grasp and craft well about. I accept death as a part of our existence but sometimes, it is truly hard to embrace. It is a reflection of a realization; I hope that somehow it is reflected.